Organising a summer holiday plan for the children with an ex

If you are recently divorced or going through a divorce, coping with the summer holidays can be challenging. Where once you may have enjoyed family holidays, the realisation that plans for the summer will need careful management can be a sobering thought.

To help you do this, we’ve put together some tips that may help you and your ex navigate how you manage arrangements for your children over the summer holidays.

Always act in the best interests of the children

Whatever the state of your relationship with your ex, it is important to put the interests of your children first. Depending on their age, they may have clubs, sporting activities and events that they enjoy during the holidays and where possible, try to keep this continuity going. Discuss how you plan to share the expense of these activities and make arrangements for transport.

Be flexible

While your agreement or court order may stipulate how the summer holidays are managed, good co-parenting requires a degree of flexibility and compromise. If possible, remain open to working around each other’s schedules and work commitments to make any arrangements work for both you and the children.

Be clear when communicating

If it is difficult to communicate directly with your ex, writing everything down in a clear and neutral fashion can help to dial down heightened emotions. Find a communication channel that works for you both, whether that is face-to-face, telephone calls, emails, or through a trusted third party. Often plans can change at the last minute and you both need to be able to resolve scheduling issues or unexpected events as easily and quickly as possible.

Be creative

Do you know other families having trouble with childcare over the summer holidays? Could you share the burden? Do you have family members and friends who may be able to help? Are there any subsidised community initiatives that the children could benefit from?

If you work from home, can you plan a timetable of activity for the children to allow you to work in peace? Be as creative as you can when thinking of ways to resolve childcare issues because having these in place will give you all greater peace of mind.

Prepare well in advance

Uncertainty can be difficult for children to cope with. While they may not be overjoyed at some of the summer holiday arrangements you have put in place, knowing in advance what is happening is important for them. This gives everyone ample time to review and negotiate the plan to get the best possible results for you all.

Finally, if you can put your children’s wellbeing at the forefront of any holiday planning, it will help to ensure that you all enjoy the relaxed summertime vibe.


If you are struggling with the impact of divorce and separation, we offer a no obligation initial consultation for a fixed fee of £100 (incl. VAT), for up to one hour. At this meeting, we can advise you on all the issues relating to your personal circumstances, allowing you to make informed decisions moving forward.

To book an appointment please call 01444 472700, email us at or complete the form below.

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